About

My name is Jordan.

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That’s me on the right. In the donkey pajamas.

I am best known as the co-creator of several of your wet dreams. For my hard work and dedication Genitalia Times gave me a glowing review along with their highest rating, an amazing two fists up.  An honor very few have ever had forced upon them.

I graduated Magma Cum Laude from the astutely named and Pennsylvania based “Beaver College” in the year 2000, receiving my first degree in sexual assault which has helped me achieve my dreams. Remember guys, ladies love a learned man.

I think the biggest thing I took from college and my courses was that “no” just means “try again”. Had it not been for these lessons, I wouldn’t be traveling the world. Had I given up after all my failures, I’m sure I would be flipping burgers at McDonalds.

As wild as it seems. I managed to graduate college before my graduation from high school in 2003. Which was convenient since Beaver College changed their name to Arcadia University in 2001. Creative liberties or wonder child? You be the judge.

A few years back, I broke new ground by coming in from behind while at the time staying front focused with the goals at hand for which Sphincter Weekly attributed me with their infamous Pinky Prize in 2013. It is safe to say that I have truly been blessed.

Now if all of that seemed horribly inappropriate and immature. I assure you it was. Nice to meet you.

The “Traveling Donkey Show” is a traveling blog and future YouTube show. It is focused on my travels throughout the world. (Currently in the Philippines)

It is not setting out to be a typical run of the mill show or blog. If you haven’t figured it out by now, I have no intentions of keeping things politically correct or proper. I have a dark sense of humor and while it does not mean I don’t hold compassion for those around me, it does suggest that if you’re a prude with the intentions of being everyone’s martyr you might want to stay far away from here because I will make it a mission to troll you publicly for having been a boring idiot.

While things won’t be all fun and games, I do take some inspiration from the “Jackass” and “Wildboyz” series. So if things occasionally get weird, gross, or painful don’t say I didn’t warn you.

That being said, I also do aim to deliver some educational information as well. I am working on guides for the places in which I travel and intend to take you to see many of the wonderful things that I come across.

My goal is to give to you a look into not only my life, thoughts and imagination but a look into the world around us. This is a journey of discovery on many different levels.

Thank you for being here, and yes, I spelled Magna wrong on purpose.

To make sure you don’t fall behind on our current happenings. You can subscribe via RSS or e-mail.

Biography

I’d like to tell you that my real life story is just as exciting as my satirical list of accomplishments above were, but it turns out that I’m just some normal 30 year old guy from Canada.

I grew up in a farm house in the country never quite adapting to city life much preferring to stay outside exploring nature and my surroundings.

Then video games came along.

During my long affair with the fantasy realm, my life found out I was being less than faithful and had already sent me a few dozen wake up calls in the form of obesity and other health issues. It wasn’t for a lack of interest in the outdoors and it’s subsequent adventures but an exchange for a pursuit in escape.

I still had dreams of climbing mountains, and exploring the world. I just figured that I’d never get the chance. I was just a typical overweight self-serving American.

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Oh, and did I say I was from Canada?

Sorry, I meant America. I thought I’d give you a chance to get to know me before you hated me.

Let’s face it, there’s a lot of reasons to try to escape the every day tedium of life and the people therein, but little did I know that travel was an escape all its own. It wasn’t until I was 29 and ended up in the hospital due to repercussions of an emotionally abusive relationship that I decided I needed to escape from my “escape”.

A persons dreams often have a silly requirement of sacrifice in order for one to achieve them and my situation was no exception. I gave up my job, drugs, dead-end friends, a girl that i loved and perhaps most important of all I gave up accepting that I had no choice in the matter.

I wouldn’t be completely honest if I said that some of my problems that I was running from didn’t find a way to follow me around, after all… no matter where you go, there you are. However I’m living my dream while many people in this world won’t even come to realize what theirs are, let alone accomplish them.

It turns out that everything in my life was leading me up to this. All my failures, all my successes and all the lessons I have learned along the way have made me the person I am today and I wouldn’t change a thing.

So whats next?

Well, wouldn’t you know it… once you’ve accomplished one dream, it turns out you’ll have more waiting in the wings. This website/blog is the next step towards achieving my successive dream, which is to be able to share my adventures with the rest of the world.

Cheers to those who are here reading this turning it into reality.

My life has had held some exciting moments for me before I started traveling as well. Some of my claims to fame include having been a radio personality for the morning shows on 104.5 WSNX and 105.3 HOT FM in my hometown of Grand Rapids, Michigan.

I’ve also served time doing audio production work for 94.5 Thunder Country (now Nash 94.5) and have had the pleasure of sharing a credit roll with Bruce Willis and 50 Cent.

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I’m the one that isn’t black and scary.

In my free time I compose and write my own music,  masturbate perhaps a little too much and I guess at one point I got certified as a PADI Rescue Diver. I also enjoy hiking, mountain climbing, writing, saying inappropriate things and making myself look like an idiot.

My Contact Information

You can contact me via e-mail or follow me on Twitter or Facebook.

Please note: I do not currently accept friend requests from those I do not know. If you would rather not follow my personal page… you may alternatively like The “Traveling Donkey Show” on Facebook.

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My blog is built on WordPress 3.9.1. I use GetNoticed, a premium WordPress theme developed by Andrew Buckman and Michael Hyatt.

For blog hosting, I recommend HostGator.